| Ohio State University
scientists today announced their discovery of a strange, heretofore unreported
malady apparently afflicting elderly males native to research environments.
The condition is now named "Thompson's posterioranolapathy" after
the first subject known to have contracted it. It is characterized by a
recurrent incidence of acute respiratory and physical fatigue at higher
elevations coinciding with an unexpected and pronounced need to interface
gluteus maximus, lipid-rich tissue with irregular volcanic strata. Victims
may also show a tendency to bond appendage joints when possible. The condition
is believed to be infectious, although evidence suggests that actual infection
requires a long incubation or exposure period, sometimes lasting decades
before symptomology actually appears. Experts admit that at this time, there
are no treatments for this condition but suggest a major infusion of research
support would allow an epidemiological study that would gauge the extent
of this illness in remote, high-altitude regions around the globe. |
